The passing of MJ

Ok, I'll admit it. I hadn't given Michael Jackson much thought in recent years. I kind of thought he was a great musician who had unfortunately taken a turn for the worse and would probably be in jail if he hadn't forked up $20 million dollars to settle lawsuits over child molestation. I think now that I was wrong about that. I really don't know what to believe, but I do know this: It's better to just see the best in someone. If you don't have proof of allegations, pay them no mind. It's too bad that we don't see the best in someone often until they are gone. From what I've seen in the news recently, I would say that Michael Jackson is a person who saw the best in everyone because as Brook Shields said in her eulogy "he looked with his heart and not his eyes." God rest his tortured soul, maybe he is finally at peace.

Things I did today

Today I:

cleaned up the kitchen

went through my coupons

swapped the furniture in Cayden and Emalee's room around

did two loads of whites

ate 2 small squares of lovely dark chocolate

played in the garden with the kids while Matt planted some corn

thought about mopping, but decided I was not up to the task

read "If you take a Mouse to the Movies" for the 10,000th time

pushed Emalee as high as humany possible on the swing

changed the sheets in the guest bedroom

downloaded a sangria recipe

created my shopping list for this weekend's celebration party

ordered a cake from Publix

received loads of hugs from my wonderful children

listened to a fair amount of whining and crying (and no, not my own.)

chatted with an old friend on facebook

had a "special coffee"

Well those are the highlights! Good night world.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful women in my life who are mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers.

I was lucky enough to be loved beyond comparison by two wonderful special and loving women who were the "mothers" in my life. My biological mom, Rebecca, was a wonderful and brave woman. She got pregnant when she was only 15 years old, but refused to ever consider anything other, than becoming a great mother. All the family said that I was the "one" thing she ever finished in her life. She forged ahead, and with the help of a loving family, we grew up together. Rebecca had a terminal illness that she battled throughout my life, and God finally decided to take her home just months before her 32nd birthday and my 16th. It's been 20 years ago this year, and I still have vivid memories of our great times together. It hurt when she passed away, but nothing in comparison to when I lost my second "mom," Dana. Because at 15, I really didn't understand yet what I had lost, or what I had been given in Rebecca.

Dana is Rebecca's sister. She and Gary took care of me and raised me as if I were there own daughter. I was lucky enough to have a second chance at a great mother. I know I am biased, but I'm telling you, these were wonderful women! Different as they were, they have made me who I am today, and I wouldn't trade a moment with either one of them for all the gold in the world.

The only regret I have, is that I didn't truly know what a treasure I had in either one of them until I became a mother myself. Since I lost my Dana, only 2 days after Cayden was born, I was never able to verbalize all those things to her, and I've written and re-written a letter to her a hundred times over in these last three years. You can't get the kind of perspective that you need until you become a mother yourself. I always knew how much I loved her, but I never knew how much I needed her until she was gone. She was that one person who was always on my side no matter what. Everything she ever did in life was done to get me ahead without thought or care for her own agenda. You just can't understand that kind of love until you have it for your own child. I know they look down from Heaven and know how much I owe them! I hope to make them proud and that through me, Cayden and Emalee get to experience a little bit of their love, humor, joy, determination, knowledge, and everything they would have shared as the wonderful grandmothers they would have been.

One more thing, God blessed me with a truly caring and loving mother-in-law too! I know, I am a lucky girl, beyond what I ever deserve! She's a beyond amazing Grammy - just ask my kids. Just bring up "Grammy" and they both go nuts! She also cares about me and makes herself available to me when I need mom too!

Last year, Gary also remarried a kind and caring woman. My relationship with her is just beginning to grow, and I'm thankful for that as well.

I am also surrounded by a ton of wonderful women. I have beautiful friendships with women of all ages. Thanks to each of you! I couldn't go on this journey alone. Happy Mother's Day!

What's for Dinner?

So, we went strawberry picking today. It's was fun and not "too" hot. The "too" part is relative. If you are a Southerner, then it wasn't so bad today. At least 2 of us were strawberry picking. My 3 year old was strawberry eating! By the time we left, he was red and sticky from head to toe and being followed by a group of flies just dying to lick the red gooey leftovers from his sweet little dirty face. Stawberry Shortcake (my 2 year old daughter) was a little neater eater, but she would eat the leaves, stem, and all if I wasn't looking. Ah well, a little fiber never hurt anyone. So we are home, a little sticky and a little tired, but quite content.
The kids are sleeping, so I'm googling something to make for dinner... Stawberry Salad w/ berry balsamic dressing and grilled chicken? ....... mmmm...... Strawberry Jam? Who has the time? Stawberry Pavlova? Definitely too many ingredients on that list. I'm hot and tired. 4.2 pounds of strawberries sounds good to me!

Some Days

Some days I love writing. Other days I don't and can't keep a thought in my head for two seconds. Today is one of those days. I feel like I have a lot to say, but I can't keep the train on its track long enough to spit it out. Plus, it doesn't help that if I sit down at the computer for any length of time, my children are starting to treat this activity like they treat my being on a telephone call: They lose their mind and all hell breaks loose. Oops, I'm going to try to go hold hell back if I can. I'll finish this thought later, maybe!

Thanks to all my girls!

Thank you to all my girl friends, aunts, sisters-in-law, mother-in-law, and so on. If you're a female in my life, then I am so lucky and glad to have you, and today is just about saying thanks. Thanks for all the times you've listened, shared, hugged, cried, and giggled with me. My life wouldn't be the same with out you. I was checking out some blogs today while I had a few minutes as the kids were finishing breakfast. Below is a quote that was posted on one of the blogs.

What I expect from my male friends is that they are polite and clean. What I expect from my female friends is unconditional love, the ability to finish my sentences for me when I am sobbing, a complete and total willingness to pour their hearts out to me, and the ability to tell me why the meat thermometer isn't supposed to touch the bone.
-Anna Quindlen, Living Out Loud


This quote just summed it up perfect for me. Thank you for being you, and being by "go to" girl for something. Each and every one of you make up my support team, and I wouldn't be me without you!

Maintaining your Quality of Life in Today's World

Turn on the news, and your hear nothing but bad news lately: unemployment at an all time high, housing market in the toilet, economy shrinking. You name it, they are talking about how it is going down hill, and fast. It seems like they are bailing out everyone but you. Something I think important to remember is this: quality of life and standard of living are not the same. The people selling stuff to us don't want us to remember that. In fact, they often use the terms interchangeably.

Standard of living is measured by consumption, making it measured by income. The degree to wich your basic needs (food, clothing and shelter ) are fufilled are what makes up your "standard of living." Quality of life is how you feel about your life and yourself. It is possible to have a very high standard of living and a low quality of life. You've always heard the term money doesn't by happiness, well that is certainly true. In these times, I believe it's important to remember that you can decrease your standard of living and increase your quality of life.

It seems simple, but its no wonder that Americans often confuse the two concepts. We are bombarded by marketing at every level, and a major goal of advertising is for consumers to equate the consumption of a their product with a higher quality of life. You've heard Dave Ramsey call it American Excess. We as Americans are sold on the idea of having everything we want, and that things make us happy. Just turn on the TV, and you can see it everywhere. A new cadillac will not get you happiness, respect, or even joy, but it will get you car payments and make some greedy bankers pockets fatter if you can't afford it. And who can blame the marketing folks, linking a particular product to those qualities is a homerun marketing strategy. The product itself then takes on a greater role in our lives than the actal function it was purchased to provide. And who can blame them for this seduction? It's fairly necessary in a competitive market... an the salesman have a standard of living to attain as well.

Now work on your soul, your family, your passion and work to increase your quality of life over your standard of living.

Inspiration

Inspiration can come from anywhere, I suppose. Today I am inspired to do something creative. I live inside my head a lot - meaning that I make loads of plans for the future that never come to fruition because I am too busy thinking about something else to take a minute and jot things down. And then there's having 2 toddlers, talk about distraction. I never finish anything without interruption, ever! (Which, incidentally can make you crazy over time, unless I've always been crazy and none of you ever bothered to tell me.) Well, today, we built a tent in the living room. It was really fun and the kids had a ball with it. They have no idea that their mother is seriously lacking in architectural capability. Our tent is constructed from a parachute, a small lightening mcqueen sofa, 2 sheets, the ottoman, and a collapsible play tunnel. Pretty good huh? Now they are playing with kiddie flashlights in there and loving it. I am having coffee, and yes with a teeny tiny tipple of Baileys. I'm just beginning to get warm, on this dreary day.

My two new loves

Relax, I'm not having any more children. My two new loves are Chardonnay and ricotta cheese. I've never liked Chardonnay before, it's always tasty dirty to me, and not dirty in the bad for you way like double fudge chocolate cake, like real dirt ... too much like licking tree bark for me. I've always prefered sweeter whites, saving my stronger taste for Reds. Well, I went to an ASID event with my mother in law last week and they were serving only Chardonnay. It wouldn't be like me not to have a little wine, so I had 3 glasses. The event was held in the Knoll furniture show room, so I assume that they didn't want to chance any Red Wine stains on their furniture samples, thus Chardonnay. It was really lovely. I had 3 glasses, (did I say that already?) and I really enjoyed it. A good friend told me one time that your taste buds change every 7 years, I guess mine are now fans of chardonnay. Now on to even more important things: RICOTTA CHEESE. I've never been a fan. I could only take it in small doses, say buried in red sauce in the middle of lasagna ,until recently. A new pizza spot opened in Canton. The name is Casadelli's. If you want good NY style pizza, you need go no further. The pizza is excellent. They have a special (my favorite) called Mama's lasagna pizza which is pizza with red sauce, fresh mozarella, ground beef, and dollops of Grande Ricotta. Any good pizza maker will know Grande cheese, it's the best cheese you can get in the US, and available only to those in food service. Grande ricotta is as smooth as butter! It started something bad, very bad. I am now thinking of new ways to work Ricotta into every meal. A great dessert that I can't get enough of is berries macerated with some type of liquer (I like creme de cassis) and then topped with a mixture of ricotta, honey, and vanilla! OMG! So good! So bad! I made ricotta lemon muffins on Saturday... yummy! I am thinking next I will try Ricotta pancakes. (So much for avoiding the dreaded fat/carb combo!)